


Untitled (REPOSTED)

by mousaerato



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Adopted Children, Drabble, M/M, Step-Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-10-07 23:11:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17374982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mousaerato/pseuds/mousaerato
Summary: The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.





	Untitled (REPOSTED)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MintyCoolness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MintyCoolness/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Parallel Lines](https://archiveofourown.org/works/643524) by [runpuprun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/runpuprun/pseuds/runpuprun). 



> I had originally posted this to tumblr in 2016. With the recent mass deletions and failures of the backup options, I personally see the writing on the wall with regards to tumblr as a viable repository for writing. This piece, though small, had quite a few people wondering where it went when I first deleted it from tumblr back in January 2017. Sometimes you never know what will be popular, I guess.
> 
> At the end of 2018, I received several comments about my works and general writing skill that really did a number on me. In a fit of anxiety, I deleted all my shuakeshu independent works, as I was only able to see the flaws and the failings in them. Two friends in the fanfic and Persona 5 community came to me today and asked me to put them back up.

****

It starts when the house feels a little too big again, even after years of happy birthdays, first days of school, late night health emergencies, and soothing bad dreams. They never thought they would be able to adopt a child; the prospect of welcoming another was beyond their wildest hopes. Even so, there they were, talking with social workers as their dark-haired son played around the room anxiously.

A child walks out from another room, and before the staff can shoo him back, their son runs to him to greet him, persistent that the brown haired child stay by his side.

“If he has to go, I’ll go with him,” the child defiantly says. He grabs the other child’s hand.

He is 10, and his parents are aware he’s already chosen their new addition to their home.

* * *

Their new child, they’re told, is 11, and has been quite a handful: a history of behavioral problems, crying fits, and sleep issues. From the looks of the boy’s lithe frame, he was malnourished, too, though the social workers decline to address it with them.

Despite all the warnings, they see the brown-haired boy happily running and talking with their son. They act like they’ve been waiting to talk again for years, despite it being their first meeting.

They are advised against adopting him, but the smiles on both the boys’ faces tell them they’ve made the right decision.

“What’s your name?” asked the curly haired boy.  
“Akechi Goro,” he replied robotically, obviously fed up with the question.  
“They say it’s Kurusu Goro now,” he smiles.

The 11 year old smiles. He never looks back as they go home, too preoccupied talking to his little brother about crime fighters and detectives and giant machines.

* * *

They buy a cake to celebrate. Goro eats it with tears in his eyes.

All the joy quickly sours as soon as he tries to sleep. He jolts awake, kicking and screaming, and neither of his new caregivers can seem to console him.

Akira overhears the commotion and rushes quickly to his brother’s side. He holds his hand, and somehow manages to chase away the demons.

Akira stays the night in his room. Their parents decide to let it remain that way.

* * *

Their nights are spent talking instead of sleeping. Goro tells harrowing tales of being tossed from house to house and Akira listens, spellbound.

When Goro tells him of the beatings, Akira promises they don’t do that here.

“Hands are for helping,” he explains, clearly quoting his caregivers.

It is the first time Goro is listened to and believed. He confesses everything, trusting the darkness to bright grey eyes.

* * *

Socialization comes slowly. Goro takes to schooling easily, clearly bright and articulate. Akira’s social circle grows with time, but his brother - his first, best friend - is always there.

Goro never thinks of talking to anyone else. No one could better understand him. When his other friends are gone, Akira looks at Goro with bright eyes and unflinching attention. They seem to speak their own language, and ignore everything else.

* * *

Akira is 11 when their parents try to separate them.

The 12 year old bargains, not understanding the reason. Who needed “privacy,” he thought, when he could share everything with his friend? His parents take him aside and begin the quiet, delicate talk of growing pains and yearnings, hoping he could understand.

He nods in agreement and wonders if the same will happen to the one they call his brother. Separating from him is more painful than any physical change.

Akira sneaks in under the dark of night. They still find ways of sharing everything, even a bed.

* * *

Akira is 12 when it first happens.

He wakes alone - unnaturally, horrifyingly alone - and confused, guilty. He quickly changes out of his underwear and hides them in the sheets he needs to clean.

He knows he can tell his parents anything, or so they claim, but he feels a wall he never felt before.

He considers telling Goro, but after watching him walk past ready for a shower, he decides against it.

It is the first time he’s ever kept a secret. He washes the sheets by himself, and decides to stay in his room instead.

No one is told why.

* * *

Goro gets his first love letter at 14.

The concept of it confuses him - how could someone who barely speaks to him feel something so engrossing? He keeps his eyes low and his voice quiet, opting to avoid the questions from giggling girls.

There’s only one person he could ever believe loved him, and it certainly wasn’t any of his classmates. Eventually, he learns to charm smiles from them, keeping the admirers at a safe distance. Meanwhile, he talks to his dearest friend, never telling him of the dreams he’s had.

* * *

Their bond is tested when Akira is 14 and Goro is 15.

It’s the first time they aren’t classmates - separate bedrooms, separate schools, practically separate lives. Akira savors the time they have at breakfast, and Goro thinks to himself that somehow, words feel empty between them. He wishes things could be as they were: a shared space, shared thoughts, shared spirit. For him, that is normal.

Akira comes home that night and tells Goro that he almost got his first kiss. Goro’s face twists as he asks the details:

“How’d it happen?”  
“A girl got dared to kiss me.”  
“What’d you do?”  
“I moved away.”  
  
The boys both smile, unable to hide the relief they both feel.

* * *

   
They grow back together after that. They find ways to sneak messages between and during classes, sharing secret jokes and confessing all the details of their days.

Goro looks sad when he declines Akira’s offer to try sharing a room again. The guilt would consume him if it weren’t for the faint look of relief in his eyes.

* * *

Their shared friends’ parents marvel over them, asking how one family could be so blessed to have two wonderful, confident, kind sons. It is at that moment they both realize they’ve never thought of each other as brothers.

Alone, Goro asks to Akira, “What are we?”  
“I don’t know” is all he can answer. “And I don’t care.”

* * *

Their parents are confounded by their boys’ disinterest in dating. They question their children alone and together, and the answers are always the same: “No, he’s not seeing anyone, and I’m just not interested.”

Neither of them tries to explain why. Instead, they stay awake in secret, talking about the world and everything else.

They are like children again. They can’t understand why they would ever need anyone else.

* * *

Goro’s nightmares return again. After over a solid year of restful sleep, he wakes with a scream he tries to muffle.

Akira is there immediately holding his hand until he calms down.

When Goro hugs him, he holds him tightly, unwilling to let go. Akira’s fingers somehow find their way into his brown hair, and Goro’s hands end up unwittingly at Akira’s unclothed hips.

This feels different, they both think, but neither of them breaks the embrace. Akira is too at peace, and Goro is too comfortable.

* * *

At 15, Akira sees Goro leaving the shower. For the first time, he covers his eyes.

The 16 year old finds his eyes linger on Akira’s shoulders when he takes off his shirt to get comfortable.

They spend the next year avoiding each other in daylight, savoring images and memories of each other’s voices at night. It is the first time either of them understands why their parents insisted on separate rooms.

* * *

It happens when Goro is 17.

He knows – believes – he has the house to himself, thanks to business meetings and after-school club practice. He strips and falls lazily into bed, hand fumbling between his legs with nervous energy.

He closes his eyes and thinks about the ideal lover.

Just as his name tumbles from his lips, Akira pushes open the door on the scene, as if summoned by Goro’s voice.

Akira isn’t upset. He talks soothingly over Goro’s thin defenses - the “I can explains” and “Please don’t hate mes” are meaningless to him.

He sees Goro shivering in bed, eyes glistening, and exhales a deep sigh.

It’s then that Goro notices Akira’s hand quietly moving down his pants, face flushed and eyes downcast.

“It’s okay. I understand,” Akira assures.  
“I’m messed up,” Goro concedes.  
“If you’re messed up, then I am too,” he murmurs.  
“No” is the only response Goro can give to Akira’s self-deprecation.

It’s at that moment they both understand. They never thought of each other as brothers anyway. That word was always incomplete.

* * *

Akira is 16 when he gets his first kiss, and it is with exactly who he always wanted.

They sleep in the same bed for the first time in years. Neither of them has ever felt more comfortable.

* * *

People begin talking in the most secretive of whispers about the boys with a shared last name who are always joined at the hip in their free moments, talking to each other as if nothing else existed, giving passers-by a glimpse of unreserved smiles and a warmth they never showed anyone else.

Their friends notice one day that they’re holding hands under the table. Someone would say something had it not seemed so natural.

* * *

They put their belongings in a single room, resolving to sleep beside each other every night.

They kiss before they fall asleep. Each time, they whisper their wants without shame. No one else could understand, but they could understand each other.

One week later, their goodnight kiss leaves a thread of spit between them for the first time.

* * *

It is one month later that Goro says “I love you.” Akira says it back and it is perfect to his ears.

“That’s the first time I’ve said that,” Goro admits.

“No it wasn’t,” Akira, and he pushes his lips to his.

They’ve been saying wordlessly it to each other for years, they realize. Goro pulls Akira on top on him in their small bed, eager for something he could not explain.

* * *

Only once do they talk about their peculiar arrangement. They do so while their limbs are twined together, the only fabric present being the thin sheet that covered them.

“How do we explain this?”  
“There’s a term for when you’re in love and family.”  
“What is it?”  
“Married.”

They kiss again and all doubt is gone.

* * *

They decline to go on the family vacation. Their parents are quietly excited to have time to themselves. Their sons feel the same.

They do not ‘take’ each other’s virginity.  It is freely, happily given, and joyously received.

They work slowly, struggling to keep their eyes open as they move together. Goro cries as he lays in Akira’s lap, and Akira kisses him hungrily as he swallows back their shared sighs and whispered vows of unending love and devotion.

They are both convinced they are the only two people who know what it means to fully know and love another human being by the end.

* * *

Goro is 18 when he moves out. He buys a larger bed and makes sure there’s two of everything.

He has never spent a night alone there.

Akira is 18 when he moves in, and they never look back.


End file.
